Sunday, December 11, 2011

I don't know what this is

Marriage should be a conversation that never ends.

I'm on a plane. Metaphorically speaking. I'm in the air, and I know I'm going somewhere, but I can't feel it. I can't feel the progress or the changes, I just know they're happening. I wonder if that's better or worse than being able to feel it. Would it cause more anxiety? More calm?

I keep alternating between being ok with my life and being unhappy with it. Well, maybe not unhappy, exactly, just...less satisfied than I'd like to be, maybe. It usually stems from a conversation with a friend about where their life is headed, and I just realize that mine is so completely different. And that's not really a bad thing, it's just a thing that makes me examine my life. But what's that saying? An unexamined life isn't worth living? I guess that's true. But I don't like this huge weight that sits on my chest while I'm examining it, so if someone would like to take care of that for me, that'd be great.

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