Today was Pat's memorial service. It was really nice to hear about his life, his philosophies, his ideas, etc. Mike seems to be handling everything pretty well. He is under the impression that Pat passed to bring everyone together, which is really sweet. For example, Mike had Kelsey introduce me to this guy named Adam who lives in New York because he's Jewish. Mike is hilarious in that way.
In Kelsey's eulogy (is it still a eulogy if it isn't at a funeral?) she talked about how she ended up moving to Chico. Well, Mike talked about it first, but it was more about how he and Pat moved here. Mike had the interview at the school, got the job, and Pat just said "let's go." Even though he had never seen Chico. Then Mike and Pat would call Kelsey and tell her how beautiful Chico was and how vegan friendly and whatnot. Finally, during one of her conversations with Pat, he said something along the lines of "what's the worst that can happen? You fail and you end up moving home. It's not the end of the world."
Recently, Kelsey and I had a conversation that went similarly about me moving to New York. As much as I love living here, I think I'm ready to get out. The only thing that has really been holding me back is money and fear. But like Pat says, what's the worst that can happen? I run out of money and end up moving back to California and in with my parents. But even that isn't the end of the world (regardless of how much I hate the valley). I don't know, living there the summer of 2008 just wasn't enough for me. I was there for three months, and I didn't even get close to seeing or doing everything. I didn't even make a dent!
So that's it. It's decided. I'm moving back to New York. And if I fail, it'll be ok. At least I'll have tried. And it's the right decision for now.
Showing posts with label new york. Show all posts
Showing posts with label new york. Show all posts
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Make believe...
Tonight ended up not being so bad after all.
I accidentally left my phone at home, so when he called me I wasn't around to answer it. I got home around 5:30, saw that he had called, and called him back. He didn't pick up the first time, so I waited about ten minutes, then called again.
"Hello?"
"Hey, how are you?"
"I'm ok, starved. Are you hungry?"
"I could definitely eat."
"Ok, where shoud we meet?"
"You were supposed to pick an Italian restaurant..."
"Oh, that's right I was. Well, how about we go to Franky's? That's Italian."
"Sure, I've never been there."
"Ok, how about I'll meet you there at 6 and then drive you home?"
"Sure." (I don't think he knows I have a car.)
I walked to the restaurant, and ended up getting there five minutes early. Asked for a table for two, then sat down. Ten minutes later, he showed up.
"Sorry I was five minutes late."
"It's ok."
"Give me a hug."
(I did)
The conversation started out kind of halted, talking about politics (why does he always bring up politics right away? I wish I cared more. I know, I'm a bad American. Boo freaking hoo.), then slowly moving on to other things. He talked about his trip to Los Angeles last spring and how much he hated living there. How he dated a woman who made him feel insignificant and money conscious, and bored. He said that she said that he was the least affectionate person she knew, and he told me that wasn't true, that he's actually a very affectionate person. He continued to talk about her for a good 10 minutes, telling me all the awful things she did and how she kept bringing him to museums. He said he hates museums. (If you'll recall, I do as well.) He said he likes art that moves, like theatre or music. (I was going to question him on this point, because as far as I know the only theatre he likes is Les Miz and West Side Story, but I decided not to.) I told him about my summer in New York, and how many shows I saw. I tried to name them all, but he makes me nervous and I couldn't remember. He told me that he saw August: Osage County, and we talked about that for a little while. He asked if I was single, I told him I was, but not by choice. He asked if I wanted a relationship. I said I would, but it seems kind of pointless since I'm leaving. He asked "wouldn't this be the time to take time for you?" I asked him if he was single. He said "mostly." He said he doesn't have a girlfriend.
He asked me if I was happy.
I tried to explain to him what I felt, but I couldn't find the words to do it. I told him I was "happyish. Maybe." He asked me what that meant. It took me awhile, but I figured out how to word it so that I was ok with it.
"The summer in New York was so good for me..."
"So you were really in your element there."
"...but it stressed me out a lot too."
"Why?"
"It made me realize that this is my last year of college, and I still need so much training to even be close to the same level as all of those amazing people that are out there right now."
Then he told me that I needed to be involved with theatre somehow for the rest of my life. That he could see what passion it ignited in me, and how happy I seemed when I was talking about it. He said that it didn't matter what capacity it was in - "it could be marketing, or box office" - but I needed it in my life in some way, and he could tell what an important part it is of who I am. I agreed with him. Then he told me that I have secret talents. (News to me.) He said sometimes we never turn out to do the things we think we're going to. He never expected to be a teacher. I asked what he thought he was going to be. He said "a trial lawyer." When I asked him why the change, he said "I couldn't get past the fact that I wouldn't be helping many people."
A little while later he told me I looked sad. I made the excuse that it was my face (because most of the time it is!).
"It's not your face, your natural expression is very lovely."
"Uh, ok."
He looked for our server, then said the next part very quickly: "You look hot, are you sure you don't want dessert?" I laughed, and declined.
He got up to pay for our meal, then came back and sat down.
"I take it back, you don't look sad. You look relaxed and debonair."
"I'll take that over sad!"
And then he asked me what I was thinking.
"You know that's one of the hardest questions to answer?"
"I can think of much harder questions. You know, you can always ask me what I'm thinking? You know I'll tell you anything?"
I felt the awkwardness sliding back in, so I asked for his drink of choice.
"I tell you to ask me anything, and that's what you want to know?"
"Yes."
A few minutes later he asked if we could go hang out at my place. I said sure. We came to my apartment, and he wandered around a little bit. He looked at my room (which was only semi-clean) and my pictures, then told me I hadn't sent him any videos in awhile. I must have looked confused, because he said "of you doing stuff...you know...singing?" That calmed me down a bit (a little more than a year ago I sent him a video of me giving my freshman roommate a lapdance...), then told him I would send him some soon.
Then he told me that next time we should start later, and go out to dinner.
I walked him to the door, he hugged me and said goodbye.
I accidentally left my phone at home, so when he called me I wasn't around to answer it. I got home around 5:30, saw that he had called, and called him back. He didn't pick up the first time, so I waited about ten minutes, then called again.
"Hello?"
"Hey, how are you?"
"I'm ok, starved. Are you hungry?"
"I could definitely eat."
"Ok, where shoud we meet?"
"You were supposed to pick an Italian restaurant..."
"Oh, that's right I was. Well, how about we go to Franky's? That's Italian."
"Sure, I've never been there."
"Ok, how about I'll meet you there at 6 and then drive you home?"
"Sure." (I don't think he knows I have a car.)
I walked to the restaurant, and ended up getting there five minutes early. Asked for a table for two, then sat down. Ten minutes later, he showed up.
"Sorry I was five minutes late."
"It's ok."
"Give me a hug."
(I did)
The conversation started out kind of halted, talking about politics (why does he always bring up politics right away? I wish I cared more. I know, I'm a bad American. Boo freaking hoo.), then slowly moving on to other things. He talked about his trip to Los Angeles last spring and how much he hated living there. How he dated a woman who made him feel insignificant and money conscious, and bored. He said that she said that he was the least affectionate person she knew, and he told me that wasn't true, that he's actually a very affectionate person. He continued to talk about her for a good 10 minutes, telling me all the awful things she did and how she kept bringing him to museums. He said he hates museums. (If you'll recall, I do as well.) He said he likes art that moves, like theatre or music. (I was going to question him on this point, because as far as I know the only theatre he likes is Les Miz and West Side Story, but I decided not to.) I told him about my summer in New York, and how many shows I saw. I tried to name them all, but he makes me nervous and I couldn't remember. He told me that he saw August: Osage County, and we talked about that for a little while. He asked if I was single, I told him I was, but not by choice. He asked if I wanted a relationship. I said I would, but it seems kind of pointless since I'm leaving. He asked "wouldn't this be the time to take time for you?" I asked him if he was single. He said "mostly." He said he doesn't have a girlfriend.
He asked me if I was happy.
I tried to explain to him what I felt, but I couldn't find the words to do it. I told him I was "happyish. Maybe." He asked me what that meant. It took me awhile, but I figured out how to word it so that I was ok with it.
"The summer in New York was so good for me..."
"So you were really in your element there."
"...but it stressed me out a lot too."
"Why?"
"It made me realize that this is my last year of college, and I still need so much training to even be close to the same level as all of those amazing people that are out there right now."
Then he told me that I needed to be involved with theatre somehow for the rest of my life. That he could see what passion it ignited in me, and how happy I seemed when I was talking about it. He said that it didn't matter what capacity it was in - "it could be marketing, or box office" - but I needed it in my life in some way, and he could tell what an important part it is of who I am. I agreed with him. Then he told me that I have secret talents. (News to me.) He said sometimes we never turn out to do the things we think we're going to. He never expected to be a teacher. I asked what he thought he was going to be. He said "a trial lawyer." When I asked him why the change, he said "I couldn't get past the fact that I wouldn't be helping many people."
A little while later he told me I looked sad. I made the excuse that it was my face (because most of the time it is!).
"It's not your face, your natural expression is very lovely."
"Uh, ok."
He looked for our server, then said the next part very quickly: "You look hot, are you sure you don't want dessert?" I laughed, and declined.
He got up to pay for our meal, then came back and sat down.
"I take it back, you don't look sad. You look relaxed and debonair."
"I'll take that over sad!"
And then he asked me what I was thinking.
"You know that's one of the hardest questions to answer?"
"I can think of much harder questions. You know, you can always ask me what I'm thinking? You know I'll tell you anything?"
I felt the awkwardness sliding back in, so I asked for his drink of choice.
"I tell you to ask me anything, and that's what you want to know?"
"Yes."
A few minutes later he asked if we could go hang out at my place. I said sure. We came to my apartment, and he wandered around a little bit. He looked at my room (which was only semi-clean) and my pictures, then told me I hadn't sent him any videos in awhile. I must have looked confused, because he said "of you doing stuff...you know...singing?" That calmed me down a bit (a little more than a year ago I sent him a video of me giving my freshman roommate a lapdance...), then told him I would send him some soon.
Then he told me that next time we should start later, and go out to dinner.
I walked him to the door, he hugged me and said goodbye.
Monday, September 1, 2008
Whisper her name...
Talk about an eventful night.
Last night, I had a birthday party for a friend of mine. It was a special birthday party though, definitely not the typical kind. First of all, she doesn't live in northern California. She's in Santa Barbara. Well, really, she's buried there.
My first real week in New York, my friend killed herself.
I remember getting the call. My mom called me at 10am on that Friday morning. I was upset that she had called that early because it was my only day to sleep in, and I wanted to sleep til noon. I didn't pick up, but she didn't leave a message. I called her back right away, asking if it was important. She said it was, but if I was still sleeping I could call her back later. That caught my attention. She was calling to tell me that on Wednesday, M had taken her life.
I hadn't talked to M in a few months, so I didn't really know what was going on in her life, but she had emailed me around Thanksgiving to wish me a happy birthday and to comment on the fact that I was thinking about becoming a Jewish educator. She thought it was so cool that I might be a rabbi or a cantor or a teacher of Judaism. She told me that she was bragging to her boyfriend about it and everything.
God, I miss her.
We were never that close or anything, but our families were in the same group at the temple. Our Havurah (basically a group of families that make up another family) always had events planned, so we hung out a lot. When I was younger, I actually thought she didn't like me. Of course, that's how I feel about a lot of people, but for her it was worse because she was in my Havurah. Anyway, eventually we became a little closer, hanging out when our moms would get together. She was such a tomboy, and I was a girly girl, so our personalities clashed, but one day when it was raining we put bathing suits on (I put the top of mine on backwards) and did a rain dance. There are pictures.
Anyway, last night I had a birthday party for her, and I guess things just hit me harder than I was expecting them to. It also didn't help that I drank a lot. (For those of you who want to know how much I had - an entire bottle of white wine, a triple sec and pomegranate juice, two and a half pina coladas...that's all I can remember. It's possible I had other drinks.) There was a lot of crying, and a lot of text messaging, and a lot of conversations that should have been had while sober. I think the thing that keeps getting me through this is that at least she's not hurting anymore. Silver lining.
Happy birthday, M. I hope you're doing better, wherever you are.
Last night, I had a birthday party for a friend of mine. It was a special birthday party though, definitely not the typical kind. First of all, she doesn't live in northern California. She's in Santa Barbara. Well, really, she's buried there.
My first real week in New York, my friend killed herself.
I remember getting the call. My mom called me at 10am on that Friday morning. I was upset that she had called that early because it was my only day to sleep in, and I wanted to sleep til noon. I didn't pick up, but she didn't leave a message. I called her back right away, asking if it was important. She said it was, but if I was still sleeping I could call her back later. That caught my attention. She was calling to tell me that on Wednesday, M had taken her life.
I hadn't talked to M in a few months, so I didn't really know what was going on in her life, but she had emailed me around Thanksgiving to wish me a happy birthday and to comment on the fact that I was thinking about becoming a Jewish educator. She thought it was so cool that I might be a rabbi or a cantor or a teacher of Judaism. She told me that she was bragging to her boyfriend about it and everything.
God, I miss her.
We were never that close or anything, but our families were in the same group at the temple. Our Havurah (basically a group of families that make up another family) always had events planned, so we hung out a lot. When I was younger, I actually thought she didn't like me. Of course, that's how I feel about a lot of people, but for her it was worse because she was in my Havurah. Anyway, eventually we became a little closer, hanging out when our moms would get together. She was such a tomboy, and I was a girly girl, so our personalities clashed, but one day when it was raining we put bathing suits on (I put the top of mine on backwards) and did a rain dance. There are pictures.
Anyway, last night I had a birthday party for her, and I guess things just hit me harder than I was expecting them to. It also didn't help that I drank a lot. (For those of you who want to know how much I had - an entire bottle of white wine, a triple sec and pomegranate juice, two and a half pina coladas...that's all I can remember. It's possible I had other drinks.) There was a lot of crying, and a lot of text messaging, and a lot of conversations that should have been had while sober. I think the thing that keeps getting me through this is that at least she's not hurting anymore. Silver lining.
Happy birthday, M. I hope you're doing better, wherever you are.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
I like lists
Shows I saw while in New York:
Altar Boyz - 6/20/08
A Chorus Line - 6/27/08
Passing Strange - 7/9/08
Mary Poppins - 7/9/08
Passing Strange - 7/19/08
[title of show] - 7/21/08
August: Osage County - 7/23/08
Boeing Boeing - 7/25/08
Legally Blonde - 7/26/08
In The Heights - 8/7/08
The First Breeze of Summer - 8/10/08
Gypsy - 8/13/08
Hairspray - 8/15/08
Spamalot -8/16/08
Thurgood - 8/16/08
Jersey Boys - 8/17/08
[title of show] - 8/17/08
Sweet. Jealous?
Places I stayed while in New York:
76th and Park (Upper East Side)
59th and 2nd (Midtown East/Upper East Side)
86th and Amsterdam (Upper West Side)
10th and Ave A (East Village)
115th and Broadway (Upper West Side)
Altar Boyz - 6/20/08
A Chorus Line - 6/27/08
Passing Strange - 7/9/08
Mary Poppins - 7/9/08
Passing Strange - 7/19/08
[title of show] - 7/21/08
August: Osage County - 7/23/08
Boeing Boeing - 7/25/08
Legally Blonde - 7/26/08
In The Heights - 8/7/08
The First Breeze of Summer - 8/10/08
Gypsy - 8/13/08
Hairspray - 8/15/08
Spamalot -8/16/08
Thurgood - 8/16/08
Jersey Boys - 8/17/08
[title of show] - 8/17/08
Sweet. Jealous?
Places I stayed while in New York:
76th and Park (Upper East Side)
59th and 2nd (Midtown East/Upper East Side)
86th and Amsterdam (Upper West Side)
10th and Ave A (East Village)
115th and Broadway (Upper West Side)
Monday, August 18, 2008
sleepy sleepy sleep jet lag planes goodnight
Made it back to California safe and sound. Can't believe how exhausted I am. And how bad timing was the theme of the day.
Update to come later, just wanted to let y'all know I'm home ok. In case you were worried.
And now I'm off to bed because I can't keep my eyes open. Aaaaaaah jet lag.
PS Hey SO@24, want to hang out while I'm in LA? Ha.
Update to come later, just wanted to let y'all know I'm home ok. In case you were worried.
And now I'm off to bed because I can't keep my eyes open. Aaaaaaah jet lag.
PS Hey SO@24, want to hang out while I'm in LA? Ha.
Friday, August 15, 2008
Leaving on a jet plane...
So, Monday morning at 6:30am I leave the big city of New York and fly back home to Los Angeles. I'm excited to go home, but I'm really sad, too.
I'm excited because I miss sleeping in my own bed with my own things surrounding me. I have tons of pictures of family and friends up on my walls, books on my bookshelves...And my bed is supercomfortable! (Especially in comparison to the chair I've been sleeping in since the 13th...not that I'm complaining...thanks Rachel!) Plus it'll be great to spend a little time with my family for a few days before heading back up to school on the 22nd.
And I'm actually excited about going back to school, too! I feel like this semester is really going to be good for me. I'm planning on working hard, and being prepared for all of my classes...of course, I say this before every semester starts and the usual pattern occurs: I'm really enthusiastic for the first two weeks, and then I put the homework off a night thinking "it's ok, I still have tomorrow to do it," which then turns into me making a list halfway through the semester of all the reading I still need to do. (Last semester I had over 200 pages for 2 classes that I never ended up reading. Did decently well in the classes though, so that's good-ish.) But this time I'm planning on doing it right, staying enthusiastic the whole time. I got to choose what classes I wanted to take this semester, they just mostly had to be upperdivision. (Nevermind that two of the classes I REALLY wanted to take were cancelled after I had enrolled in them...stupid budget cuts.)
Not only that, but I miss my friends. I feel like I always make some good friends towards the end of the spring semester, right before summer break, soI have people to go back and talk to. Plus, I have a new roommate, so it'll be interesting getting to know her. My other roommate is still there too, and he's newly 21, so it'll be fun going to bars with him and the rest of whatever crew we manage to scrape together.
On the flip side, I really am going to miss New York. Taking subways to get wherever you need to go, being able to go to a different show every night, seeing all the strange people...it's SO different from what I'm used to.
And I'm really going to miss the friends that I've made here. Because it was such a short time, a few of us got really close really fast, making things so much more enjoyable. I'm really going to miss Laura's brilliant comebacks ("It's people like you......who make the world............stupid."), and Emma's twinlike Baby Spice looks, and Rachel's....well, everything. I can't even pinpoint one thing. It's just going to be so different going back to school and not having the three of them (or even just one of them) with me all the time. They are the ones I spent the most time with while I was here. What's going to happen when we are all separated?
I wish I was better at keeping in touch with people, because then I would be less worried about the state of our friendship once we all go to our respective places of residence.
But for now, I still have the weekend, and I plan to enjoy it while it lasts.
Thanks New York. I owe ya one.
I'm excited because I miss sleeping in my own bed with my own things surrounding me. I have tons of pictures of family and friends up on my walls, books on my bookshelves...And my bed is supercomfortable! (Especially in comparison to the chair I've been sleeping in since the 13th...not that I'm complaining...thanks Rachel!) Plus it'll be great to spend a little time with my family for a few days before heading back up to school on the 22nd.
And I'm actually excited about going back to school, too! I feel like this semester is really going to be good for me. I'm planning on working hard, and being prepared for all of my classes...of course, I say this before every semester starts and the usual pattern occurs: I'm really enthusiastic for the first two weeks, and then I put the homework off a night thinking "it's ok, I still have tomorrow to do it," which then turns into me making a list halfway through the semester of all the reading I still need to do. (Last semester I had over 200 pages for 2 classes that I never ended up reading. Did decently well in the classes though, so that's good-ish.) But this time I'm planning on doing it right, staying enthusiastic the whole time. I got to choose what classes I wanted to take this semester, they just mostly had to be upperdivision. (Nevermind that two of the classes I REALLY wanted to take were cancelled after I had enrolled in them...stupid budget cuts.)
Not only that, but I miss my friends. I feel like I always make some good friends towards the end of the spring semester, right before summer break, soI have people to go back and talk to. Plus, I have a new roommate, so it'll be interesting getting to know her. My other roommate is still there too, and he's newly 21, so it'll be fun going to bars with him and the rest of whatever crew we manage to scrape together.
On the flip side, I really am going to miss New York. Taking subways to get wherever you need to go, being able to go to a different show every night, seeing all the strange people...it's SO different from what I'm used to.
And I'm really going to miss the friends that I've made here. Because it was such a short time, a few of us got really close really fast, making things so much more enjoyable. I'm really going to miss Laura's brilliant comebacks ("It's people like you......who make the world............stupid."), and Emma's twinlike Baby Spice looks, and Rachel's....well, everything. I can't even pinpoint one thing. It's just going to be so different going back to school and not having the three of them (or even just one of them) with me all the time. They are the ones I spent the most time with while I was here. What's going to happen when we are all separated?
I wish I was better at keeping in touch with people, because then I would be less worried about the state of our friendship once we all go to our respective places of residence.
But for now, I still have the weekend, and I plan to enjoy it while it lasts.
Thanks New York. I owe ya one.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Secrets....for everyone?
Last week flew by so quickly! To be honest, I don't really remember much of what I did except for working at the theatre, hanging out with Rachel (different Rachel from before, this one is from one of my internships...we're also in a facebook relationship), Emma, and Laura, and watching a few episodes of Grey's Anatomy. Oh, and moving into Rachel's dorm because my brother came back and sort of left me with no place to sleep.
I've been spending most of my recent weeks with Rachel, Emma, and Laura. Emma and Laura are two girls from England who are interning at the same theatre as Rachel and I are. Rachel and I became friends last month after I had an adventure that involved alcohol, suspenders, and Williamsburg. All three of them are really awesome. (Hi girls!)
I think I'm going to change directions of this post though.
I had decided when I first started writing in this blog that I wasn't going to give out the address, that it was going to be a blog for me and if people happened to find it then so be it. Then I decided that I should give it to one person who knew me in real life so that I would feel like someone knew about it and then it wasn't really a secret. So I told a friend from school, and my cousin, two people in completely separate parts of my life. Then, I told Rachel about it (I think I was drunk, I'm not quite sure though). Then I asked permission to use people's names in it. Then I mentioned that I had a blog to other people, but didn't give them the link. And I have come to this conclusion:
I suck at keeping (most of) my own secrets.
I'm really good at keeping other people's secrets, but when it comes to my own...the cat is ALWAYS out of the bag. I have a crush on someone? Everyone knows. I'm not doing well in a class? Even information that shouldn't really be shared with people is common knowledge! It's frustrating because I plan on keeping things to myself, but somehow they end up shared.
The example I can think of most (besides the blog thing) is my cruisefling. (Ha, more sharing. Oh well.) I went on a cruise back in December to celebrate my grandparents 60th anniversary (seriously amazing) and my Grandmother's 80th birthday. I love the piano and anyone who can play it. (I've mentioned this.) I went to the piano bar on the first night of the cruise, and the piano player and I hit it off, one thing led to another and voila! A cruisefling was born. When I got back from the trip I decided that I wanted to keep it to myself, not tell anyone. It was my business, why should I share it? That didn't last for long. I think two days after I had gotten back more than half of my friends knew. And when I share a "secret," I kind of become obsessive about it. So I was talking about it a lot. Again, I think I've shared this.
Anyway, I suck at keeping my own secrets.
Here's something that shouldn't be kept a secret though: a blog about the new subway scrabble contest. Check it. Seriously.
I've been spending most of my recent weeks with Rachel, Emma, and Laura. Emma and Laura are two girls from England who are interning at the same theatre as Rachel and I are. Rachel and I became friends last month after I had an adventure that involved alcohol, suspenders, and Williamsburg. All three of them are really awesome. (Hi girls!)
I think I'm going to change directions of this post though.
I had decided when I first started writing in this blog that I wasn't going to give out the address, that it was going to be a blog for me and if people happened to find it then so be it. Then I decided that I should give it to one person who knew me in real life so that I would feel like someone knew about it and then it wasn't really a secret. So I told a friend from school, and my cousin, two people in completely separate parts of my life. Then, I told Rachel about it (I think I was drunk, I'm not quite sure though). Then I asked permission to use people's names in it. Then I mentioned that I had a blog to other people, but didn't give them the link. And I have come to this conclusion:
I suck at keeping (most of) my own secrets.
I'm really good at keeping other people's secrets, but when it comes to my own...the cat is ALWAYS out of the bag. I have a crush on someone? Everyone knows. I'm not doing well in a class? Even information that shouldn't really be shared with people is common knowledge! It's frustrating because I plan on keeping things to myself, but somehow they end up shared.
The example I can think of most (besides the blog thing) is my cruisefling. (Ha, more sharing. Oh well.) I went on a cruise back in December to celebrate my grandparents 60th anniversary (seriously amazing) and my Grandmother's 80th birthday. I love the piano and anyone who can play it. (I've mentioned this.) I went to the piano bar on the first night of the cruise, and the piano player and I hit it off, one thing led to another and voila! A cruisefling was born. When I got back from the trip I decided that I wanted to keep it to myself, not tell anyone. It was my business, why should I share it? That didn't last for long. I think two days after I had gotten back more than half of my friends knew. And when I share a "secret," I kind of become obsessive about it. So I was talking about it a lot. Again, I think I've shared this.
Anyway, I suck at keeping my own secrets.
Here's something that shouldn't be kept a secret though: a blog about the new subway scrabble contest. Check it. Seriously.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Freak out.
I've been very busy lately. Erik and Beth left on Thursday. I've been hanging out with people from my theatre internship the other nights. It's just been a very full week. So. I haven't posted.
I feel bad when I don't post, because at first I was very enthusiastic, and now I'm not so much. I mean, I still want to get my thoughts out there, but at the same time...I feel like people don't care that much about what I have to say.
Tonight I kind of freaked out, because I couldn't get in to my apartment. This has happened before, but tonight I was a little more scared because my phone was very close to dying. I called my parents after I tried for five minutes to get in to no avail. They kept giving me suggestions, but finally I just started buzzing people hoping SOMEONE would be awake and would buzz me in. Luckily, after buzzing four people someone let me in. They buzzed it for just long enough to let me through the front door. My key doesn't work in the front door for some reason, but it works in the second. Thank goodness it does, otherwise I would still be outside!
In other news, I have a thing for piano players. The professor plays piano. For some reason, I kind of think it doesn't matter what age or sexual orientation you are if you play piano. You could be 32 and gay, and I would still totally have a crush on you if you play piano. But at the same time you could be 40 and straight, and I would have a crush on you too if you had those magic fingers.
I'm not really sure why I like piano so much. I guess it's just soothing or something. It calms me down.
I'm drunk. I don't make sense.
In MORE other news, I just found out that a guy that I kind of thought was cute last Monday is straight, and not gay like most of the interns thought. He told me tonight that I "clean up nice". Sweet. He's cute. Too bad I'm leaving NY two weeks from Monday. Oh well.
This post is stupid. Whatever. I'm going to the beach with my cousin in the morning. Awesome. Goodnight.
I feel bad when I don't post, because at first I was very enthusiastic, and now I'm not so much. I mean, I still want to get my thoughts out there, but at the same time...I feel like people don't care that much about what I have to say.
Tonight I kind of freaked out, because I couldn't get in to my apartment. This has happened before, but tonight I was a little more scared because my phone was very close to dying. I called my parents after I tried for five minutes to get in to no avail. They kept giving me suggestions, but finally I just started buzzing people hoping SOMEONE would be awake and would buzz me in. Luckily, after buzzing four people someone let me in. They buzzed it for just long enough to let me through the front door. My key doesn't work in the front door for some reason, but it works in the second. Thank goodness it does, otherwise I would still be outside!
In other news, I have a thing for piano players. The professor plays piano. For some reason, I kind of think it doesn't matter what age or sexual orientation you are if you play piano. You could be 32 and gay, and I would still totally have a crush on you if you play piano. But at the same time you could be 40 and straight, and I would have a crush on you too if you had those magic fingers.
I'm not really sure why I like piano so much. I guess it's just soothing or something. It calms me down.
I'm drunk. I don't make sense.
In MORE other news, I just found out that a guy that I kind of thought was cute last Monday is straight, and not gay like most of the interns thought. He told me tonight that I "clean up nice". Sweet. He's cute. Too bad I'm leaving NY two weeks from Monday. Oh well.
This post is stupid. Whatever. I'm going to the beach with my cousin in the morning. Awesome. Goodnight.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
So tired.
I am so so so tired. Last night I went to bed at 1:30, but woke up around 2:30 with an awful stomachache. Awful. And I couldn't take a tylenol pm by that point because last time I did that at 2:30 I slept til noon, even though I had to work. So I was forced to suffer through it. I couldn't fall back asleep at all. It was ridiculous. I kind of felt like opening my brother's window and tossing myself into the park. Less pain.
Anyway, Beth and Erik are staying with me now until they leave tomorrow. I think the plan tonight is to go to the Wonderful World of Disney, then to Spotlight and get completely trashed and sing like we're amazing. Which we are! Musical theatre people can sing, so...there's that. I'm not conceited, I swear. No really. Erik is a little, but we love him anyway.
I can't believe this is my last week at one of my two internships. That means that I'm not here for very much longer. I leave on the 18th, and it's the 30th now. Wow. That's so soon! I can't believe how fast the time flew while I was here.
I feel like I've gotten a lot of what I wanted to done since I've been here, so that's good. I wish I wasn't as apathetic towards museums and stuff though, because if people ask me if I went there, I have to say no. And then they give me this look like "you are so uncultured. What a loser!" and there's nothing I can do about it. But I'm not uncultured, I just don't really care for museums. I like hands on whatnot. So like...the California Science Center is cool. (I went to prom there my junior year with my friend Chris, and it was AWESOME.) But I'd rather be actually doing something than trying to figure out what some artist's brush strokes were trying to convey. I like pictures. Yeah. But anyway, I've seen a bunch of shows, which I've wanted to see. I've stayed up til 6am with friends, and gone to a few parties, gone to the Empire State Building and Statue of Liberty, hung out at a few bars, met a lot of people...done a lot of stuff.
I feel like this trip has given me a lot of insight into myself too, but I'll save that for later, after I actually leave NY. Then I can truly reflect.
I wrote some more lyrics two nights ago. I don't know if I've mentioned that I write songs. I've written two songs so far. Woo. I want to learn how to play guitar. That'd be cool. Or piano. Then I could accompany myself! But I don't know how to play either. Sad day.
Ok, this post is stupid enough, so I'm going to get back to work. Slash looking at other people's blogs.
But before I go....any suggestions for things I should in my last two weeks in New York???
Anyway, Beth and Erik are staying with me now until they leave tomorrow. I think the plan tonight is to go to the Wonderful World of Disney, then to Spotlight and get completely trashed and sing like we're amazing. Which we are! Musical theatre people can sing, so...there's that. I'm not conceited, I swear. No really. Erik is a little, but we love him anyway.
I can't believe this is my last week at one of my two internships. That means that I'm not here for very much longer. I leave on the 18th, and it's the 30th now. Wow. That's so soon! I can't believe how fast the time flew while I was here.
I feel like I've gotten a lot of what I wanted to done since I've been here, so that's good. I wish I wasn't as apathetic towards museums and stuff though, because if people ask me if I went there, I have to say no. And then they give me this look like "you are so uncultured. What a loser!" and there's nothing I can do about it. But I'm not uncultured, I just don't really care for museums. I like hands on whatnot. So like...the California Science Center is cool. (I went to prom there my junior year with my friend Chris, and it was AWESOME.) But I'd rather be actually doing something than trying to figure out what some artist's brush strokes were trying to convey. I like pictures. Yeah. But anyway, I've seen a bunch of shows, which I've wanted to see. I've stayed up til 6am with friends, and gone to a few parties, gone to the Empire State Building and Statue of Liberty, hung out at a few bars, met a lot of people...done a lot of stuff.
I feel like this trip has given me a lot of insight into myself too, but I'll save that for later, after I actually leave NY. Then I can truly reflect.
I wrote some more lyrics two nights ago. I don't know if I've mentioned that I write songs. I've written two songs so far. Woo. I want to learn how to play guitar. That'd be cool. Or piano. Then I could accompany myself! But I don't know how to play either. Sad day.
Ok, this post is stupid enough, so I'm going to get back to work. Slash looking at other people's blogs.
But before I go....any suggestions for things I should in my last two weeks in New York???
Friday, July 25, 2008
Oh my god, oh my god you guys
This week has been a week full of shows, which I have to say is pretty awesome.
Monday was [title of show]. Wednesday was August: Osage County. And tonight was Boeing, Boeing (which was awesome. I got to meet Christine Baranski and Bradley Whitford and the rest of the cast. And the show was hilarious. Physical comedy at it's finest! More on the shows later though).
Later today (Saturday) I'll be seeing Legally Blonde the musical. With Bailey Hanks. Woo, how exciting.
This week has taken a lot out of me though. I keep going to bed really late (like tonight) and then my sleep schedule gets all screwy.
But I finally got my laundry taken in today! So that was a big girl move.
I'm not a fan of talking on the phone (even to people I LIKE talking to), so this was a big deal. I called the laundry people, then told them my information, and they came to pick up my laundry! And then I realized that they only had my clothes and my card number and my address, yet no phone number or name. They could have stolen my clothes! I mean, I guess not really. But whatever. Anyway, they picked up my clothes and now they have all my information, and I'm going to have them deliver it tomorrow. Since I was out getting tickets for Boeing, Boeing when they told me it was finally done tonight.
I'm sorry these posts have gotten a tad mundane. I'll be more interesting soon, I promise...
It's been really cool having Erik here after all. He brought his friend Beth with him who is really really nice. She actually knows a lot of the same people that I know, which is cool. It means we get to talk about people. Plus, we get along really well so we've been ragging on Erik the whole time. It's really fun. And he just takes the abuse! We keep telling him to fight back because then it would be witty banter, but he just refuses. It's fun. But more on the two of them later. I have to go to bed so I can be up early to get my laundry back and go see Legally Blonde!
Goodnight!
Monday was [title of show]. Wednesday was August: Osage County. And tonight was Boeing, Boeing (which was awesome. I got to meet Christine Baranski and Bradley Whitford and the rest of the cast. And the show was hilarious. Physical comedy at it's finest! More on the shows later though).
Later today (Saturday) I'll be seeing Legally Blonde the musical. With Bailey Hanks. Woo, how exciting.
This week has taken a lot out of me though. I keep going to bed really late (like tonight) and then my sleep schedule gets all screwy.
But I finally got my laundry taken in today! So that was a big girl move.
I'm not a fan of talking on the phone (even to people I LIKE talking to), so this was a big deal. I called the laundry people, then told them my information, and they came to pick up my laundry! And then I realized that they only had my clothes and my card number and my address, yet no phone number or name. They could have stolen my clothes! I mean, I guess not really. But whatever. Anyway, they picked up my clothes and now they have all my information, and I'm going to have them deliver it tomorrow. Since I was out getting tickets for Boeing, Boeing when they told me it was finally done tonight.
I'm sorry these posts have gotten a tad mundane. I'll be more interesting soon, I promise...
It's been really cool having Erik here after all. He brought his friend Beth with him who is really really nice. She actually knows a lot of the same people that I know, which is cool. It means we get to talk about people. Plus, we get along really well so we've been ragging on Erik the whole time. It's really fun. And he just takes the abuse! We keep telling him to fight back because then it would be witty banter, but he just refuses. It's fun. But more on the two of them later. I have to go to bed so I can be up early to get my laundry back and go see Legally Blonde!
Goodnight!
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Too many thoughts are running through this head of mine
I've started and deleted four entries in the past 20 minutes. None of them seemed interesting enough, so I'll just summarize them all here:
1. Last night I was terrified that someone broke into my brother's apartment somehow because I heard a loud bang in the living room. However, when I went to check (which I HAD to because my cousin made me) nothing was out of place...fricken weird.
2. My friend Erik (from the same theatre group as The Director) is in town and we're going to see August: Osage County tonight! I'm excited. I hope he doesn't get all flirty and weird like he normally does. But, since that's how he normally acts...He probably will. I'm excited to see him though, it's been a long time.
3. In Jane Green's novel, Swapping Lives, married men and women seem to not have opposite sex relationships with non-married men and women. I'm not married, so I don't know.
But it kind of seems true. I don't think either of my parents have relationships with non-married couples, nor would they go to lunch with one of their friend's opposite counterparts. I'm not quite sure though. Hmmmmmmm. Questions, questions.
4. I've recently discovered Pandora.com and I LOVE it. I typed in Ferras and now I get to listen to all sorts of awesome people like Ingrid Michaelson, Sara Bareilles, Ben Folds, The Afters, The Weepies, etc etc etc. AWESOME!
and now I'm off to see August: Osage County!
1. Last night I was terrified that someone broke into my brother's apartment somehow because I heard a loud bang in the living room. However, when I went to check (which I HAD to because my cousin made me) nothing was out of place...fricken weird.
2. My friend Erik (from the same theatre group as The Director) is in town and we're going to see August: Osage County tonight! I'm excited. I hope he doesn't get all flirty and weird like he normally does. But, since that's how he normally acts...He probably will. I'm excited to see him though, it's been a long time.
3. In Jane Green's novel, Swapping Lives, married men and women seem to not have opposite sex relationships with non-married men and women. I'm not married, so I don't know.
But it kind of seems true. I don't think either of my parents have relationships with non-married couples, nor would they go to lunch with one of their friend's opposite counterparts. I'm not quite sure though. Hmmmmmmm. Questions, questions.
4. I've recently discovered Pandora.com and I LOVE it. I typed in Ferras and now I get to listen to all sorts of awesome people like Ingrid Michaelson, Sara Bareilles, Ben Folds, The Afters, The Weepies, etc etc etc. AWESOME!
and now I'm off to see August: Osage County!
Monday, July 21, 2008
Die, Vampires, Die!
I saw [title of show] tonight. Since I didn't have work at the theatre that I normally have work at on Monday nights, I went by myself to get tickets. When I went in, the guy selling tickets told me about the lottery that they have, which had tickets that were the same price as back row in the balcony, but the seats are in the front row. The only catch was that the lottery wasn't for another hour.
When the time finally came to get in line for the lottery, I noticed a girl who had been sitting by herself in Starbucks (which is where I had gone to pass the time). I went up to her and asked if she was seeing the show by herself, and she said yes, so to increase our chances of getting tickets I asked if she would put down two and I could put down two, and she agreed that it was a good idea. Since we still had half an hour to wait for the names to be pulled, we started talking, and it turns out that she had the same major as me, just at a different school. She was in NY for the summer (like me), but taking a 6 week acting class.
Normally I feel like I have a handle on my insecurities, but tonight I feel like I really failed at keeping them in check. I mean, it's probably because most of the time I just try not to think about the fact that there are millions of girls who look like me but are thinner, who sing like me but better or with more control, who act like me but better...who are a better version of me. But when I was there, talking to this girl who was a musical theatre major who still had two years left who was taking acting classes in New York, who had been to 12 or 13 shows and was able to critique them, who already knew that she wanted to go to London next summer to study at the Royal Academy, who had more knowledge than me...I started doubting myself more and more. There is so much I don't know, so much I'm scared of, so many things that I think I'm not good at...Things that I need to improve on or I'll never make it anywhere. As it is there are only a few people who actually make it on Broadway or that are well known - who's to say I'm even going to come CLOSE to that?
When I see shows that have characters that question themselves and eachother, like [title of show] did, it brings up questions in me.
At school, you get out of it what you put in, but if you don't know how to put more in, how can you get everything you need out of it? I'm the kind of person that needs my ass to be kicked so I can learn what I need to know, but I'm scared. I'm scared of so many things...but I don't know how to get over it.
What if I'm never ready to perform on Broadway? What if I'm never good enough? What if...ugh. Damn those stupid "what if" questions.
In [tos] they have a song called "Die, Vampires, Die" which is all about killing off the insecurities and self-doubt. So I'm going to try to do that, but....ugh. It's hard, ya know?
When the time finally came to get in line for the lottery, I noticed a girl who had been sitting by herself in Starbucks (which is where I had gone to pass the time). I went up to her and asked if she was seeing the show by herself, and she said yes, so to increase our chances of getting tickets I asked if she would put down two and I could put down two, and she agreed that it was a good idea. Since we still had half an hour to wait for the names to be pulled, we started talking, and it turns out that she had the same major as me, just at a different school. She was in NY for the summer (like me), but taking a 6 week acting class.
Normally I feel like I have a handle on my insecurities, but tonight I feel like I really failed at keeping them in check. I mean, it's probably because most of the time I just try not to think about the fact that there are millions of girls who look like me but are thinner, who sing like me but better or with more control, who act like me but better...who are a better version of me. But when I was there, talking to this girl who was a musical theatre major who still had two years left who was taking acting classes in New York, who had been to 12 or 13 shows and was able to critique them, who already knew that she wanted to go to London next summer to study at the Royal Academy, who had more knowledge than me...I started doubting myself more and more. There is so much I don't know, so much I'm scared of, so many things that I think I'm not good at...Things that I need to improve on or I'll never make it anywhere. As it is there are only a few people who actually make it on Broadway or that are well known - who's to say I'm even going to come CLOSE to that?
When I see shows that have characters that question themselves and eachother, like [title of show] did, it brings up questions in me.
At school, you get out of it what you put in, but if you don't know how to put more in, how can you get everything you need out of it? I'm the kind of person that needs my ass to be kicked so I can learn what I need to know, but I'm scared. I'm scared of so many things...but I don't know how to get over it.
What if I'm never ready to perform on Broadway? What if I'm never good enough? What if...ugh. Damn those stupid "what if" questions.
In [tos] they have a song called "Die, Vampires, Die" which is all about killing off the insecurities and self-doubt. So I'm going to try to do that, but....ugh. It's hard, ya know?
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Right When it was Starting to Feel Real...
I keep wanting to post something of substance, but Passing Strange is clouding my mind. How ridiculous is that?
When I came to NY before I went to Israel over spring break, Daniel (my older brother) had to go to work. I was staying with him for the three days before I left on my trip, so while he was at work, I wandered around the city a bit. He was living on the Upper West Side, so I just wandered straight down to Times Square and looked around there a bit. Because I didn't really have any particular place in mind, I just sort of walked around in circles looking for something that might be fun to do. Somehow, I kept walking on 44th between Broadway and 8th Ave, and I saw the sign for Passing Strange. I had no idea what that show was, so I kept walking, not even stopping to glance at the poster or signs that were around it. Around 5, Daniel called me and we went to TKTS to see if we could get tickets for anything that night. He told me to choose two shows, just in case one was sold out. My first choice was Spring Awakening, and then I picked one at random, and it was Passing Strange. Spring Awakening was sold out, so we got tickets for Passing Strange.
We went to dinner at this place called Mars 2112 (a weird alien restaurant across the street from Mamma Mia), which was interesting. During dinner, Daniel and I talked about what I wanted to do with the rest of my life regarding theatre or a cruise line or whatever I thought I wanted to do, so I kind of had that in the forefront of my mind when we went into the show. We ate dinner quickly, then headed over to the theatre.
When we first got into the theatre I didn't really know what to expect (since I hadn't heard of the show), and they were playing this really weird music that sounded like it was badly recorded. It wasn't music that I recognized, but it seemed kind of "olde tyme" or however you spell that. The show started off with Stew (the narrator) starting the story with the rock and roll kind of vibe, and it was very cool. The show continued, chronicling Stew's life through other actors. The whole story just really got to me, and made me think. It was about Stew's life and his attempt to write songs and music and whatnot.
I think one of the things that got to me the most was towards the end. Stew was talking about how after one of the free previews, his friend (who has a pretzel stand down in the East Village) told him that the thing that the Youth was looking for in the play, the "Real" only exists in art. And that really got to me. Of course he lightens the moment immediately with a "damn pretzel man. You're [deep]*" but it was enough to set me off crying immediately. It was just so...sad? Profound. I don't even know. The whole show just made me think about everything. I don't even know how to explain it really.
Anyway, while I've been back in NY, I've seen the show twice. (Unfortunately it closed today, otherwise there's a good possiblity I would have seen it at least once before I leave next month.) The second time I saw it, I was with Rachel and Daniel, which I've already briefly talked about.
The last time I saw it was Saturday at 2pm. Spike Lee filmed it. I think I cried through the entire thing. It just really made me...feel. Wow, I sound so lame, but it's really true. It made me think about my life, and how I'm always searching for something to make me understand more about my life, but it's just out of reach. I don't know if I'm even making sense.
I'm really glad that I was able to see this show as many times as I did, even if it doesn't make sense to you. The show is just so poetic and fun and amazing and...yeah. I hope when it comes out on DVD or on TV or whatever form Spike Lee decides to release it in that you watch it. At least listen to the music.
Some of my favorite quotes:
"Everything's alright"
"Only love is real"
"Love is more than real"
"Right when it was starting to feel real"
"Is it alright?"
"If I was any more real, I'd be fiction!"
"Don't be sad about your chosen path/and where it's taken you thus far./'Cause that is what you did, and this is who you are. And it's alright."
"Come down now/remove your mask see/all you've got to do is ask me/I'll give you all the love life allows."
"My love is more real than all your dreams."
"I've been thinking about leaving my fingerprints on your being."
"Life is a movie too/starring you/you're whole family's the cast and crew./that's a little secret between god and you."
It makes more sense if you're listening to it. I urge you to buy the soundtrack because it has the liner notes and all the lyrics and helps you understand who's singing so you can follow the story a bit better. I love everything between Youth and Desi. And everything with the mother. Really, everything is good. If you go to the website you can listen to a few of the songs. Check it out. Seriously.
And now I'm off to bed with the soundtrack playing in the background.
*I can't remember the right words right now, but that's the general gist.
When I came to NY before I went to Israel over spring break, Daniel (my older brother) had to go to work. I was staying with him for the three days before I left on my trip, so while he was at work, I wandered around the city a bit. He was living on the Upper West Side, so I just wandered straight down to Times Square and looked around there a bit. Because I didn't really have any particular place in mind, I just sort of walked around in circles looking for something that might be fun to do. Somehow, I kept walking on 44th between Broadway and 8th Ave, and I saw the sign for Passing Strange. I had no idea what that show was, so I kept walking, not even stopping to glance at the poster or signs that were around it. Around 5, Daniel called me and we went to TKTS to see if we could get tickets for anything that night. He told me to choose two shows, just in case one was sold out. My first choice was Spring Awakening, and then I picked one at random, and it was Passing Strange. Spring Awakening was sold out, so we got tickets for Passing Strange.
We went to dinner at this place called Mars 2112 (a weird alien restaurant across the street from Mamma Mia), which was interesting. During dinner, Daniel and I talked about what I wanted to do with the rest of my life regarding theatre or a cruise line or whatever I thought I wanted to do, so I kind of had that in the forefront of my mind when we went into the show. We ate dinner quickly, then headed over to the theatre.
When we first got into the theatre I didn't really know what to expect (since I hadn't heard of the show), and they were playing this really weird music that sounded like it was badly recorded. It wasn't music that I recognized, but it seemed kind of "olde tyme" or however you spell that. The show started off with Stew (the narrator) starting the story with the rock and roll kind of vibe, and it was very cool. The show continued, chronicling Stew's life through other actors. The whole story just really got to me, and made me think. It was about Stew's life and his attempt to write songs and music and whatnot.
I think one of the things that got to me the most was towards the end. Stew was talking about how after one of the free previews, his friend (who has a pretzel stand down in the East Village) told him that the thing that the Youth was looking for in the play, the "Real" only exists in art. And that really got to me. Of course he lightens the moment immediately with a "damn pretzel man. You're [deep]*" but it was enough to set me off crying immediately. It was just so...sad? Profound. I don't even know. The whole show just made me think about everything. I don't even know how to explain it really.
Anyway, while I've been back in NY, I've seen the show twice. (Unfortunately it closed today, otherwise there's a good possiblity I would have seen it at least once before I leave next month.) The second time I saw it, I was with Rachel and Daniel, which I've already briefly talked about.
The last time I saw it was Saturday at 2pm. Spike Lee filmed it. I think I cried through the entire thing. It just really made me...feel. Wow, I sound so lame, but it's really true. It made me think about my life, and how I'm always searching for something to make me understand more about my life, but it's just out of reach. I don't know if I'm even making sense.
I'm really glad that I was able to see this show as many times as I did, even if it doesn't make sense to you. The show is just so poetic and fun and amazing and...yeah. I hope when it comes out on DVD or on TV or whatever form Spike Lee decides to release it in that you watch it. At least listen to the music.
Some of my favorite quotes:
"Everything's alright"
"Only love is real"
"Love is more than real"
"Right when it was starting to feel real"
"Is it alright?"
"If I was any more real, I'd be fiction!"
"Don't be sad about your chosen path/and where it's taken you thus far./'Cause that is what you did, and this is who you are. And it's alright."
"Come down now/remove your mask see/all you've got to do is ask me/I'll give you all the love life allows."
"My love is more real than all your dreams."
"I've been thinking about leaving my fingerprints on your being."
"Life is a movie too/starring you/you're whole family's the cast and crew./that's a little secret between god and you."
It makes more sense if you're listening to it. I urge you to buy the soundtrack because it has the liner notes and all the lyrics and helps you understand who's singing so you can follow the story a bit better. I love everything between Youth and Desi. And everything with the mother. Really, everything is good. If you go to the website you can listen to a few of the songs. Check it out. Seriously.
And now I'm off to bed with the soundtrack playing in the background.
*I can't remember the right words right now, but that's the general gist.
Friday, July 18, 2008
What's inside is just a lie...
I bought the Passing Strange soundtrack yesterday. That show is amazing, it's really too bad that it's closing on Sunday. I would willingly see it at least once a week for the rest of my life if I could. Well, maybe not that much, but it's amazing. I highly recommend you check it out.
I love the nights when I stay out until 5 or 6am. The world is so...quiet then. Or something. I don't know.
Last night I saw Dark Knight, and I thought it was fantastic. I don't remember much of the first one, but last night...the movie was really great. Heath Ledger was fantastic. I stopped paying attention to the fact that he was Heath Ledger and just thought of him as the joker, which was really creepy. The whole thing was...just...yeah.
Daniel (my older brother) is leaving for Israel on Sunday. I hope he has a great time. I went to Israel my freshman year of college and then again over winter break. Both experiences were really different, but they were both fantastic trips.
My mind is sort of all over the place right now, so I think I'm just going to keep listening to my Passing Strange soundtrack.
"Only love is real." - Passing Strange
I love the nights when I stay out until 5 or 6am. The world is so...quiet then. Or something. I don't know.
Last night I saw Dark Knight, and I thought it was fantastic. I don't remember much of the first one, but last night...the movie was really great. Heath Ledger was fantastic. I stopped paying attention to the fact that he was Heath Ledger and just thought of him as the joker, which was really creepy. The whole thing was...just...yeah.
Daniel (my older brother) is leaving for Israel on Sunday. I hope he has a great time. I went to Israel my freshman year of college and then again over winter break. Both experiences were really different, but they were both fantastic trips.
My mind is sort of all over the place right now, so I think I'm just going to keep listening to my Passing Strange soundtrack.
"Only love is real." - Passing Strange
Sunday, July 13, 2008
We are family...
I had brunch with my cousin (David) and my brother (Daniel) today. It was really interesting. I'm not a big talker, but I feel like I contributed to the conversation a bit.
The last time I hung out with my cousin was probably in December, when my family and my dad's brother's family and my grandparents on my dad's side all went on a cruise together to celebrate my grandparent's 60th anniversary and my grandma's 80th birthday. My grandparents are the cutest people ever, by the way. They'll have been married 61 years next month, and they still act like two teenagers. They are SO cute. It's ridiculous. If I end up half as happy as them I'll consider myself very lucky. (Yes, I might have stolen a quote from Friends for that, but whatever. It's totally true.)
Anyway, the cruise was the first time the whole group of us had been together as a unit for a really long time since probably my younger brother's bar mitzvah. So it was really nice for us to all connect again, this time with us all being a bit older (David turned 30 this year, Rebecca [David's sister] is 27, Daniel is 24, I'm 21, and my younger brother Lewis is 18). It made it so we could have seemingly adult conversations. It was a very different experience, having all of us sit at a "kids table" together, being the ages we are now, versus us 10 years ago, where none of us were really at the age where we all wanted to talk to eachother. Now we've kind of formulated who we are, and what our opinions on certain subjects are, and figured out how to talk to people.
Anyway, it was really nice being able to see David and Daniel and have a real conversation with them about things that we're all interested in now and feel included, instead of having all the subjects just go right over my head. I can actually contribute. And that's a pretty cool feeling.
The last time I hung out with my cousin was probably in December, when my family and my dad's brother's family and my grandparents on my dad's side all went on a cruise together to celebrate my grandparent's 60th anniversary and my grandma's 80th birthday. My grandparents are the cutest people ever, by the way. They'll have been married 61 years next month, and they still act like two teenagers. They are SO cute. It's ridiculous. If I end up half as happy as them I'll consider myself very lucky. (Yes, I might have stolen a quote from Friends for that, but whatever. It's totally true.)
Anyway, the cruise was the first time the whole group of us had been together as a unit for a really long time since probably my younger brother's bar mitzvah. So it was really nice for us to all connect again, this time with us all being a bit older (David turned 30 this year, Rebecca [David's sister] is 27, Daniel is 24, I'm 21, and my younger brother Lewis is 18). It made it so we could have seemingly adult conversations. It was a very different experience, having all of us sit at a "kids table" together, being the ages we are now, versus us 10 years ago, where none of us were really at the age where we all wanted to talk to eachother. Now we've kind of formulated who we are, and what our opinions on certain subjects are, and figured out how to talk to people.
Anyway, it was really nice being able to see David and Daniel and have a real conversation with them about things that we're all interested in now and feel included, instead of having all the subjects just go right over my head. I can actually contribute. And that's a pretty cool feeling.
Saturday, July 12, 2008
The sun is bright!
Whoo boy am I sunburnt. Yesterday, Rachel and I went to the Statue of Liberty, and while waiting in line for the ferry for almost 2 hours I got really sunburnt. You can see the outline of my necklace and of my shirt. It's pretty ridiculous. Not so much painful yet, but I can tell it will be tomorrow. For some reason, my sunburns always seem to get the most painful and itchy three days after the initial burn. Ever noticed that?
Over spring break, I went to Israel on a community service trip through JNF (Jewish National Fund's Alternative Spring Break). All I had to do was raise $1050 and it was totally free (not including whatever airfare I had to pay for, but everything else was included.) So I raised the money, and got to go. Woo! Every day we did some community service, ranging from clearing out a park to painting a community. The third day that we were there, we went to a Vineyard to help clear out all the sticks and stuff to make sure that the vines had room to spread (or something, I'm not sure how it really worked). We got out there at 10am. I had put sunblock on before leaving the dorms that we were living in, but because we were in the desert sun, which is RIDICULOUS, I was sunburnt by the time we stopped for lunch at 1pm. My shirt didn't cover my whole back, so my neck and a half moon shape on my shirt was about the same color as a lobster. Or a tomato. Or whatever else is bright red. I put more sunblock on after lunch, but it didn't really matter. My shirt, which was a three quarter length sleeve shirt, had given me sunburn gloves (on both my hands and my arms) in addition to the ouch that was my back. Painful. My back still is two different colors from that sunburn. Awesome.
When I was 12, my summer camp took us to the beach every monday. One monday they sent the stupid counselor with us who forgot to remind us all to put sunscreen on. Granted, we should know to put sunblock on ourselves, but we're 12! You can't really expect US to remember that! I came home that day having a bikini sunburn all the way down my back and my legs. My parents were FURIOUS that they hadn't put sunblock on us, and my mom said that if I ever came home from the beach again looking like that I wasn't going to be allowed to go back. I thought that the sunburn itself was punishment enough, but I don't think I ever let myself get that bad again. Now I just limit it to my back and my arms. Ouch.
Wear sunscreen, kids. Sunburns hurt.
Over spring break, I went to Israel on a community service trip through JNF (Jewish National Fund's Alternative Spring Break). All I had to do was raise $1050 and it was totally free (not including whatever airfare I had to pay for, but everything else was included.) So I raised the money, and got to go. Woo! Every day we did some community service, ranging from clearing out a park to painting a community. The third day that we were there, we went to a Vineyard to help clear out all the sticks and stuff to make sure that the vines had room to spread (or something, I'm not sure how it really worked). We got out there at 10am. I had put sunblock on before leaving the dorms that we were living in, but because we were in the desert sun, which is RIDICULOUS, I was sunburnt by the time we stopped for lunch at 1pm. My shirt didn't cover my whole back, so my neck and a half moon shape on my shirt was about the same color as a lobster. Or a tomato. Or whatever else is bright red. I put more sunblock on after lunch, but it didn't really matter. My shirt, which was a three quarter length sleeve shirt, had given me sunburn gloves (on both my hands and my arms) in addition to the ouch that was my back. Painful. My back still is two different colors from that sunburn. Awesome.
When I was 12, my summer camp took us to the beach every monday. One monday they sent the stupid counselor with us who forgot to remind us all to put sunscreen on. Granted, we should know to put sunblock on ourselves, but we're 12! You can't really expect US to remember that! I came home that day having a bikini sunburn all the way down my back and my legs. My parents were FURIOUS that they hadn't put sunblock on us, and my mom said that if I ever came home from the beach again looking like that I wasn't going to be allowed to go back. I thought that the sunburn itself was punishment enough, but I don't think I ever let myself get that bad again. Now I just limit it to my back and my arms. Ouch.
Wear sunscreen, kids. Sunburns hurt.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Dance Dance
My best friend Rachel was in NYC visiting her cousin the past couple of days, so yesterday she made time for us to hang out. We went gallivanting around the city hanging out and making jokes and just having a really great time. It was really awesome hanging out with her. We always have such a fun time together, laughing and making jokes and just being so natural with eachother...it's just great.
It was also great that I got to ditch out on work just to spend time with her, because I haven't seen her since probably January when I was home for winter break.
Two winter breaks ago, there was a rumor going around that there was snow falling somewhere in the vicinity of where we lived. That was just amazing to us, because snow NEVER falls near where we live. Ever. So, we got on our hats and gloves and sweatshirts and went driving around, trying to find the snow. We drove north, then east, then south, then west...but no snow was found. We drove around for probably about two hours, looking for snow, but never found it. So I called my mom, and she reported to me that the snow that was falling was about an hour away from where we were. Sad news for us. So, we drove back to Rachel's dorm and hung out there instead, where she put new music on my iPod that she thought I would like but didn't have because my computer doesn't hold much music on it.
Then, we broke out my camera.
We took a few pictures, then put a song on that our friend Jeremy wrote, and made a music video. Not a good music video, not even close to a decent music video, but a music video that has her staring at her computer the whole time except random times during lyrics that she points to me and kind of dances a little bit, while I'm singing all the words making funny faces at the camera. We're both randomly laughing and holding out notes too long or saying the wrong words and it's just hilarious.
I found that video before I left for NY and laughed at the ridiculousness of it, as well as another video that's just of me dancing over by the tv for a few seconds to another song that the same guy wrote.
A staple of Rachel's and mine when we hang out is dancing in a parking lot. The parking lot changes from time to time (usually it's the abandoned parking lot next to the college, or the parking structure near the college), but we always make sure that we dance. We put on old songs from our childhood, like Spice Girls or N*SYNC or BSB or whoever and we dance and sing at the top of our lungs with the car stereo blasting. Always a great time. We just let loose and dance. It's awesome.
If you haven't experienced dancing in a parking lot listening to old songs with a good friend or two, I suggest you try it ASAP. And then tell me about it.
It was also great that I got to ditch out on work just to spend time with her, because I haven't seen her since probably January when I was home for winter break.
Two winter breaks ago, there was a rumor going around that there was snow falling somewhere in the vicinity of where we lived. That was just amazing to us, because snow NEVER falls near where we live. Ever. So, we got on our hats and gloves and sweatshirts and went driving around, trying to find the snow. We drove north, then east, then south, then west...but no snow was found. We drove around for probably about two hours, looking for snow, but never found it. So I called my mom, and she reported to me that the snow that was falling was about an hour away from where we were. Sad news for us. So, we drove back to Rachel's dorm and hung out there instead, where she put new music on my iPod that she thought I would like but didn't have because my computer doesn't hold much music on it.
Then, we broke out my camera.
We took a few pictures, then put a song on that our friend Jeremy wrote, and made a music video. Not a good music video, not even close to a decent music video, but a music video that has her staring at her computer the whole time except random times during lyrics that she points to me and kind of dances a little bit, while I'm singing all the words making funny faces at the camera. We're both randomly laughing and holding out notes too long or saying the wrong words and it's just hilarious.
I found that video before I left for NY and laughed at the ridiculousness of it, as well as another video that's just of me dancing over by the tv for a few seconds to another song that the same guy wrote.
A staple of Rachel's and mine when we hang out is dancing in a parking lot. The parking lot changes from time to time (usually it's the abandoned parking lot next to the college, or the parking structure near the college), but we always make sure that we dance. We put on old songs from our childhood, like Spice Girls or N*SYNC or BSB or whoever and we dance and sing at the top of our lungs with the car stereo blasting. Always a great time. We just let loose and dance. It's awesome.
If you haven't experienced dancing in a parking lot listening to old songs with a good friend or two, I suggest you try it ASAP. And then tell me about it.
Friday, July 4, 2008
Happy 4th of July!
So, in honor of the fourth of July, independence day, blah blah blah whatever, I thought it would be a fun idea to tell you what I did.
I don't know if I've mentioned this yet, but I am currently in NYC. Spending my summer here, living the good life (aka couch-surfing and doing unpaid internships) doing almost anything I want to do. So. Today was a very fun-filled and exciting day for me.
Last night, I got my iPod back (finally! It had broken sometime last year and my dad finally sent it to be fixed and then sent it to my brother who gave it to me), so I spent all last night putting music on it for my adventure that I was planning today.
The plan: Hang out in central park. In one location. For a long time. Possibly people watching or writing or reading or something.
What actually happened: I left my (or the current host's) apartment around 4 pm. I had ended up staying awake until 6am putting music back on my ipod and reading SO@24's blog from the beginning (I like to know the entire story if I jump into a blog. Since he was the first person I friended on 20SB, I decided to read his entire blog first. Check him out. He's awesome at writing. And telling stories. However, this reading everything in entirety is a very long process. So...WHOA tangent.) so I didn't wake up until about 11, at which point I packed my stuff (new person's couch tomorrow!), showered, then decided I needed food so I headed out. Around 4pm. (I said that already.) I walked down the street, sporting my newly uploaded with music iPod and a blue shirt with my red hair and my white shoes. Yeah patriotism. Wandered into a Starbuck's, ordered my usual drink and a blueberry coffeecake, then sat down. According to the guy who made my drink, it was made "with love on this very lovely 4th of July, just for [me]." Awesome. Finished that up, then went to Central Park! The plan! Yes.
I ended up walking into Central Park at 4:30pm at 76th and Central Park West. Walked around for a bit until I found the reservoir, looked at it, wandered around a bit more, hung out by the tennis courts for about half an hour. By then I was getting hungry for actual food, so I decided that it was time to leave the park and go find something more nourishing than a chai tea latte and a blueberry coffeecake. Ha. That was about 5:15pm. I wandered around, looking for a way to get out, and eventually see a street. W. 100th St. and Central Park West. WHAT? I thought I had been walking SOUTH that whole time! Nope. I had been walking North. So I wandered around a bit more, hoping I was walking back the way I came, when I came to another street. Hurray, I can leave now! I check the sign. East 91st street. So now I've crossed over to the other side? Well shoot. I go back inside the park, decide to follow a path that looks like it goes west, then see another street. East 102nd St. So now I'm going North AND East, two directions I DON'T want to be going in. I go back inside the park, and see a map. Well, that's a map to the whole park, but there's no "YOU ARE HERE" to point out where I am! So I'm still just as lost. I eventually follow a path that leads me back over to the west side, when I just leave the park because I don't want to walk back to the east side again and follow the streets down. By the time I get out of the park, it's 7 o'clock.
I WAS LOST IN THE PARK FOR ALMOST TWO HOURS. Let me repeat that. TWO HOURS.
I went to Times Square to celebrate my liberation.
Bought a Magner's Irish Cider for myself. Mmm. Found out where some couple's hotel was for them (his phone died or something...I had google on my phone) and they bought me a drink. Bought another drink for myself. Closed my tab but didn't leave the bar yet because it was raining (and the fireworks were on TV! Duh.) Guy who was sitting next to me bought me a drink because I was sitting there drink-less.
Four drinks (and half a quesadilla? I think?) later, I am as happy as a clam. (Are clams happy? How does anyone know this? Are there studies? I want to see them.)
Also, some random guy on the subway asked me if he could teach me how to play tennis. Um. What?
I don't know if I've mentioned this yet, but I am currently in NYC. Spending my summer here, living the good life (aka couch-surfing and doing unpaid internships) doing almost anything I want to do. So. Today was a very fun-filled and exciting day for me.
Last night, I got my iPod back (finally! It had broken sometime last year and my dad finally sent it to be fixed and then sent it to my brother who gave it to me), so I spent all last night putting music on it for my adventure that I was planning today.
The plan: Hang out in central park. In one location. For a long time. Possibly people watching or writing or reading or something.
What actually happened: I left my (or the current host's) apartment around 4 pm. I had ended up staying awake until 6am putting music back on my ipod and reading SO@24's blog from the beginning (I like to know the entire story if I jump into a blog. Since he was the first person I friended on 20SB, I decided to read his entire blog first. Check him out. He's awesome at writing. And telling stories. However, this reading everything in entirety is a very long process. So...WHOA tangent.) so I didn't wake up until about 11, at which point I packed my stuff (new person's couch tomorrow!), showered, then decided I needed food so I headed out. Around 4pm. (I said that already.) I walked down the street, sporting my newly uploaded with music iPod and a blue shirt with my red hair and my white shoes. Yeah patriotism. Wandered into a Starbuck's, ordered my usual drink and a blueberry coffeecake, then sat down. According to the guy who made my drink, it was made "with love on this very lovely 4th of July, just for [me]." Awesome. Finished that up, then went to Central Park! The plan! Yes.
I ended up walking into Central Park at 4:30pm at 76th and Central Park West. Walked around for a bit until I found the reservoir, looked at it, wandered around a bit more, hung out by the tennis courts for about half an hour. By then I was getting hungry for actual food, so I decided that it was time to leave the park and go find something more nourishing than a chai tea latte and a blueberry coffeecake. Ha. That was about 5:15pm. I wandered around, looking for a way to get out, and eventually see a street. W. 100th St. and Central Park West. WHAT? I thought I had been walking SOUTH that whole time! Nope. I had been walking North. So I wandered around a bit more, hoping I was walking back the way I came, when I came to another street. Hurray, I can leave now! I check the sign. East 91st street. So now I've crossed over to the other side? Well shoot. I go back inside the park, decide to follow a path that looks like it goes west, then see another street. East 102nd St. So now I'm going North AND East, two directions I DON'T want to be going in. I go back inside the park, and see a map. Well, that's a map to the whole park, but there's no "YOU ARE HERE" to point out where I am! So I'm still just as lost. I eventually follow a path that leads me back over to the west side, when I just leave the park because I don't want to walk back to the east side again and follow the streets down. By the time I get out of the park, it's 7 o'clock.
I WAS LOST IN THE PARK FOR ALMOST TWO HOURS. Let me repeat that. TWO HOURS.
I went to Times Square to celebrate my liberation.
Bought a Magner's Irish Cider for myself. Mmm. Found out where some couple's hotel was for them (his phone died or something...I had google on my phone) and they bought me a drink. Bought another drink for myself. Closed my tab but didn't leave the bar yet because it was raining (and the fireworks were on TV! Duh.) Guy who was sitting next to me bought me a drink because I was sitting there drink-less.
Four drinks (and half a quesadilla? I think?) later, I am as happy as a clam. (Are clams happy? How does anyone know this? Are there studies? I want to see them.)
Also, some random guy on the subway asked me if he could teach me how to play tennis. Um. What?
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